An Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation.

How joining a Run Club can save your life.

You’re not alone.

You’re not alone in experiencing loneliness and isolation in your life. Millions of American’s are living this reality. The detrimental effects are so worrisome that the United States Surgeon General has issued an Advisory to call the American peoples attention to this urgent health issue.

Such an incredible situation we find ourselves in. With our mobile devices we have almost near instant-communication with millions of people. We have the capability to engage with our friends, family and more at will through multiple pathways in the digital realm. With communication platforms like Rumble, YouTube, X, Facebook, Discord, Twitch and more, there seems to be an endless array of communications. Yet, even with all these options to engage with people, we find ourselves in an Epidemic of Loneliness.

There’s more to it.

The human spirit yearns for connection. We have a deep seeded understanding, an instinctual beckoning, to establish a relationship with other people and to be a part of something larger than ourselves. To be a part of a community of people. We strive to be loved and to love. To show affection, support and gratitude along with receiving each of these from someone else. It’s well known that when going through hard times, it’s a little easier when you have a friend or loved one with you to help you along. It’s captured in poetry and stories worldwide that love is best when shared.

The digital world of communication is devoid of the intricacies and nuances of face to face conversation. It will never capture the subtleties of the human face and body, small movements that can stir inside of us the feelings of friendship, acceptance, trust and understanding. When you walk into a room and a friend greets you with a smile or the glint of the eye when someone is interested in what you’re saying, in you, are all lost in the ether of the internet. Also lost is the body posture and signs of someone who is angry, upset, sad or bored. No talking is needed. It can be very noticeable.

Just yesterday when walking up to my friend Luis he said “Man, you look enthusiastic today!” - I could tell by the tone in his voice and his small grin that he was being sarcastic. Inside I was not motivated and it was evident as it was projected through my demeanor and walking. My friend knew, as I did that it was a long day, without ever saying a word to each other.

It’s understandable how people can retract into their own habitats and avoid others, because sometimes people suck. We’ve all experienced the assholes who care for only themselves and exerting their will on the world with no respect or consideration of others. I like avoiding those people as well.

You may also feel like nobody understands you, nobody will “get” you or like you for who you are. You may also have such dark feelings like if you left the world today, nobody will even notice.

You are not alone! Someone out there is looking forward to seeing you again.

Someone out there is wondering if you are doing ok and hoping that your life is wonderful. Even if you don’t know who that person is or hear from them often. You are loved, and you are known, especially to God.

There’s a way out.

The great news is, there’s a way out of this! Out of the dark cave of loneliness and isolation. There is a path that leads to a better place, bright and hopeful. A place where you can develop individual relationships and become a member of a community.

It all starts with taking action. Directed, specific action to venture into something new. It’s within your DNA to explore and adventure into the unknown, even if it is intimidating and yes, sometimes scary. You have it in you to end this epidemic.

The world is not in your phone, game or book. The world is out there!

Building Individual Relationships and Community

The internet is not all doom and gloom and the catalyst to the destruction of the human spirit and American culture. The internet can connect you to communities of people who have a shared interest, communities who meet in person and function through the interconnected web of individual relationships.

For me that is running and the Veteran community. For you that may be cycling, rowing, kayaking, playing CATAN or World of Warcraft. I’ve ran through city parks where I’ve witnessed 200+ people doing Live Action Role Playing as medieval knights. I’ve been in gaming pubs where the walls are lined with Warhammer and WoW among other fantasy board games. There’s even a competitive E-sports team at many colleges. I’ve attended REPTICON and seen people make connections over there love of Snakes, Gecko’s, Lizards and Spiders. Not quit my fancy, but there was a community there.

The internet can connect you with just about any interest you have.

Find that interest, find a meetup and go attend. This only works if you show up in person. Stalking the group on Facebook or X, staying up to date on their YouTube or Discord is not enough. You must take the path away from the digital world and into reality. To make eye contact with someone who has a shared interest. To have a conversation with someone about it. To engage in a meaningful way with people.

Joining a Run Club

Joining a Run Club can quite literally save your life.

(Loneliness) It is associated with a greater risk of cardiovascular disease, dementia, stroke, depression, anxiety, and premature death. ~Dr. Murthy (Surgeon General of the U.S.)

I don’t need to sell you on the physiological benefits associated with running. They are numerous and empirical. However, joining a run club can impact you mentally, emotionally and socially in a way that leads you out of the dark realms of loneliness. When you run with a run club, you are releasing endorphins into your bloodstream and that has an undeniable positive effect on your overall health. After a run, with those endorphins flowing, having a conversation with someone seems to happen a little easier. You have a shared experience with that person. A shared experience of running, even if your paces and distances were not identical or close.

It can be terribly intimidating to join a run club for your first run. Maybe you don’t feel like a runner, or look how you think a runner should look. Most often I hear from new runners that they are “slow” or “not fast enough”. Maybe you’re not good at meeting people and talking to strangers. Some people get so much anxiety for their first run, they are in tears and shaking.

All of that will wear off. I promise.

The best advice I can give to any new runner is to show up. Then keep showing up!

You will soon start recognizing faces and names. Within a few short weeks you’ll know who is at your ability level and before you know it, you’ll have completed a dozen runs or so with someone. Without even realizing it’s happened, you’ll probably make a few friends with a side effect of becoming a better runner.

When you run shoulder to shoulder with someone, a bond can develop. You have a shared experience and you may even find yourself progressing forward in a synchronous pitter patter of feet. Often a conversation develops and with that you’ve initiated the process of establishing a relationship and integrating into the community.

Within the running community you can go even a step further by signing up for a race with someone. It doesn’t have to be the Marathon, you can sign up for a 5K, 10K or Half and do the training together. Over the course of 12 to 16 weeks, through arduous and tough training, a bond will be created. I’ve experienced this phenomenon on multiple occasions while training with two of my close friends seen above. Robert and Dave have become good friends of mine, all through the sport of running.

Showing up to my hometown club, people are greeted with a smile and welcomed. All are welcome and receive positive encouragement, no matter the pace or distance they run. The Run club has a culture of being selfless and giving. A community built on hard work and a commitment to encouraging those around us, especially if they are struggling.

The cure to this Epidemic is found in my run club. The antidote to the toxic elements of loneliness and isolation is created and administered through interpersonal interactions and group activities.

It’s A WAY not THE WAY!

Running is not the only way to end this Epidemic in America. It is simply a way, it’s the way that has helped me and I see helping many others.

You can find these connections in a church as well. I’ve seen great communities come together through religion and make great impacts on our community and society. I’ve seen them feed the poor, cloth the homeless and save the lost. You can build individual relationships and find community in almost all religions.

I’ve seen the dismantling of isolation through boating, skiing, basketball, soccer, ultimate frisbee and more recently PICKLEBALL.

Golf is a great way to connect, both traditional golf with stick and ball and Disc Golf. You’ll find an amazing community in Hiking, Backpacking, Mountain Biking and Fishing.

You can also volunteer at your local playhouse or become a Thespian yourself.

There are thousands of ways make connections. You just need to take action and GO!